Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamed I'd be a princess. Now I have it, and it's everything I could ever want, but nothing like what I hoped it would be.
I was walking through the fairy's Dreamworld with my parents. Aside from humans begging for money and drugs, it's a wonderful place. Being a fairy myself, I didn't buy anything. I didn't have to. All the owners knew my parents, so I could ride as many rides and eat as much food as I wanted to. My parents warned me to be careful. Dreamworld food tastes just like the real thing, but it does nothing for the symptoms of weakness. If I wanted to keep functioning, I'd have to keep eating real food.
I was having a blast when I was walking into the house of mirrors. It's one of the lamer attractions, it only has mirrors that make you look large or small. I was getting bored and asked my reflection, "Can't any of these mirrors show me as a princess?" And I swear to my fellow gods, my reflection answered back.
"You can't be a princess. You're too ugly."
I know now that it was probably just a trap set by a weaker nightmare trying to gain enough power to become a fairy. It was meant to horrify me so much that I would wake up in a sweat. Instead I turned and screamed, "What do you mean I'm too ugly to be a princess?! My parents say I'm the prettiest little girl in all of Faytree! Someday, I'm going to be the prettiest princess in all of the Fairylands."
When I met up with my parents to go home, I told them, "Mother, Father, I've decided that I want to be a princess when I grow up."
"Darling," Mother said, "Princess aren't like the rest of us. They have very strong magic and can hold a crowd with just their voice."
"I can learn magic. And someday I'll have the strongest voice in all of Estellia."
The very next day I checked out every book on magic I could find at our local library and read them cover to cover. I begged my parents to send me to the best school in Estellia. It was in the sorcerer lands, but I was determined to have the best magic education that one could get in Estellia. In my spare time I practiced singing, dancing, and public speaking. All things the princesses specialized in, or so I was told.
I attended every event a princess was a part of. I read every book a princess was a character in. I became friends with people who worked for or were friends of friends of the princesses. I did everything I could to get close to them.
Except for meeting them. I was smart enough to know how that would likely turn out.
When I was fifteen, my parents took me in for the exam. The one they said would determine what kind of fairy I was likely to be. They were very careful to warn me that the likelihood of me being set on the path to being a princess was slim. You needed to be truly exceptional. I didn't let that stop me. I studied hard. I practiced every day. And I passed the exam with flying colors. I received word that I would start training to be a princess within a week.
When you hear that you're training to be a princess, what do you expect? Do you think of living in glamour, with dresses covered in diamonds and glittering tiaras? Or do you imagine vicious women trying to tear you down to give themselves the best chance at the life they dream of? I imagined both. I knew that the dresses were boring, my parents had friends in the academy after all. I also knew that there were scandals caused by people doing heinous things in an effort to rise in the academy. As lawless as the Fairylands are, we do care about murder. In spite of this, the academy seemed quite drab to me.
I fully expected to find myself on someone's bad side within the first week. I'd been studious my entire life, and I always answered every question the professors asked of me. Strangely, nobody noticed me much. I realize I should be grateful for that, and I was, but I was also really bored. I was learning a lot, making a lot of friends, and while a lot of my classmates seemed to be jealous of me, nobody seemed to have much of a grudge against me. At one point, I even told my mother, "I thought training to be a princess would be much more interesting than this."
"Aren't you enjoying your studies?" She asked.
"Oh, I'm learning a lot. But aren't you supposed to be despised by everybody if you're going to become a princess? At this rate, I'm certain I'll get to meet with the council and they'll tell me I never had a chance. How can I tell them it's not my fault I couldn't make any enemies in school?"
"Where did you hear that people make enemies in the academy?" My mother asked.
"In books, mostly." I admitted sheepishly.
"Darling, most of those stories are written for the benefit of humans. Humans don't need to know the truth about what goes on at the top. If they found out, they might stop believing in those they were meant to serve."
I was at the academy for five years. I graduated at the top of my class. I got a job as an assistant.
Then, on my twenty-first birthday, the God of Shadows showed up at my apartment.
"Is this the home of Emily Elaine Maris?" He asked,
"Yes it is, your Godliness." I said. I made sure to curtsy.
"You're aware that on this day, twenty-one years ago, the Fairylands High princess died?"
"I don't think there's anyone in the Fairylands who doesn’t know that." I said.
"We've been keeping tabs on all the children born on that day, to see who has the potential to become the next God of the Fairylands. Some show potential, but only you, Emily Elaine Maris, show true promise."
I suppose I should have been shocked, or at least a little bit surprised, but at the time I only had one thought.
"If I become god of the Fairylands, how can I become a princess? It's been my goal all this time. I don't want to throw it all away."
Fortunately, he laughed. He said, "I know this comes as a shock, but I assure you that you would be an excellent goddess. If you wish to help your people out as a princess, as your predecessor did, you can do that."
"I suppose it's alright then." I said. "When should I start?"
"As soon as you are ready." He told me.
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