Just finished a really long section of my Estellian short story collection. I have to say, I feel like it's coming along really nicely. 

Alone in the Temple

     Day by day, life barely changes. 

    I didn't think being in the temple would ever be boring. It has every book that's ever been written after all. But now I can't stand it. 

     I can't leave either. The wanted posters are gone, but people talk about the new breaks in reality. I don't really know what it means. No one else seems to know either. All I do know is people are blaming the homeless for them. They know we can't run from pain. I'm lucky enough to have found a way to connect the temple to Estellia. Everywhere I go now, I see the bodies of those who weren't so lucky. 

    I should do something about this, but I don't know what. Trying to fight a God nearly got me put in prison. I know now that Estellia's a Dreamworld just like the temple is, but does that mean that I should shape it the way I would any other place in the Infinite. All I really know how to do is move doorways around and make small amounts of money. I don't know how to make the world a better place.

   One of my favorite stories is about a human who learns that lucidity is only making things worse for their friends and family. I always thought the ending was stupid, since they'd spent most of the book until that point making things better for everyone, even passerby, but then the last two chapters showed they'd only made life worse for everyone. I didn't think any of the examples, like a women killed by a train because she'd regained her ability to walk, made sense. Nightmares ruin our lives every day, and Alex has told me time and time again they don't do it for our benefit, so why should lucidity make life worse for people?

   Now though, I wonder if the book had a point. Is that what that person in the mirror was talking about? Am I just a person who uses Lucidity for evil?

   I wish I knew someone I trusted to tell me if I was doing the right thing.

  I look at the calendar on the wall of my study. It says it's getting close to the middle of spring. There should be a fair going on in the Fairylands right about now. I won't be able to go, since I'm a human, but they have a simplified version for their human citizens. I know, because I've been there multiple times. 

    I remember that there's usually a fortune teller. I know the fortunes they give humans are bogus, but right now even bad guidance would be better than no guidance at all. 

   I'll head there tonight while I'm sleeping in the temple. I don't want anything to happen by being awake in a Dreamworld. 

 I have a lot of blog Ideas, but I don’t have much I want to say right now. I’m too busy backing up all of my blog posts. I know my writing sucks, but that doesn’t mean that I’m okay with losing it.

Anarchy

 When did I stop loving society?
Why can I not see the good it brings us anymore?
Is it truly doomed to corruption and rot?
Or is that only what my injured heart is insisting is true?

Was it the pandemic that caused us to sicken?
Or did it simply kill us off?
Is the problem that our two parties won't talk?
Or do they simply have nothing to say?

Is society worth saving?
Is there a way to stave off the collapse?
If so many no longer believe it to be real,
How much longer until it gets torn apart?

The First Successful Social Media Platform

    Here's a hot take; we haven't seen the first really successful social media platform yet. I know there have been may platforms with hundreds of millions, if not billions, of users, but the issue is that most platforms start declining after roughly a decade of use. This isn't scientific, but the successful platforms I've seen so far in my life have a lifestyle that goes something like this; you start out with a cool gimmick that everyone loves, people flock to you and build lots of accounts, those accounts begin to befriend one another, those friends form networks, bullies and jerks from outside appear to start trouble, someone points out major problems with the way the site deals with minority groups, drama starts, people demand moderation, the site owners fumble, everyone gets angry,  the site get's sold to someone hoping to make a profit with no knowledge of how the site functions on a community basis, everyone leaves for the next big platform. 

    We all, I think, know this by now. The problem is that this process can take anywhere from a few years to a decade. I've been posting daily on a Blog with no followers, and I've already realized that transferring to another blog if I have to close this one for any reason would be a major hassle. Imagine doing that once a year, or worse, after spending a decade on a platform, amassing thousands of posts about your life and interactions with your followers. If the decades since the internet's inception are any indication, it's not IF you have to flee to another website, it's when. 

     So why is it like this? 

      In my opinion, my deeply uninformed opinion, it's a social problem, not a platform problem. Take Twitter, as an example. The cause of it's grief is that it was bought by Elon Musk, a man with the distinct dishonor of being deeply popular in one segment of the population, while being universally hated by pretty much everyone else. But because of the rules of capitalism, he was allowed to buy Twitter, even though most of Twitter's userbase didn't want him too. If that doesn't seem like that big of a deal, let me put it another way; imagine if, instead of electing a president, our country was just outright owned by Bill Gates. He's not Universally loved, but he knows how to keep people happy enough to not want to revolt against him. Mostly. Then, one day, Jeff Bezos decides he wants to own America, as a way of avoiding taxes on his Amazon warehouses. There's a lot of teeth gnashing, but the transfer goes through. The issue is that Jeff Bezos is much more disliked, and lacks Bill Gates' knowledge of how to keep people just happy enough to not want you dead. So the country starts to fall apart as people leave, revolt, and stop trying to keep America afloat.

     That's what's happening on Twitter. Only with one of the worst billionaires alive (who should be very grateful that Donald Trump hasn't kicked the bucket). 

     To me, the way to solve this is twofold; make social media more democratic, and make it so that the moderators are in regular contact with the people who use the site. One makes it so that Hostile Takeovers can't happen anymore, the other makes it so that people know why a post was flagged, and so moderators have a better idea of what people do and don't want to see. 

    I don't think people should be taking any advice from me, but I do think the real solution to our social media problem is going to come from learning more about the "social" part. I think that we, as people, don't really understand how society works, and why certain rules help or hurt. Economists have tried, but they only understand a small part of it. It's going to take a lot more time, and a lot more effort, on the part of academics and normal folk alike, to make the first truly successful social media platform. 

Calling to the Infinite

     I've been talking a lot about the death of Twitter, because honestly it's the only social media platform I have any connection with. But I have to say, I'm really appreciative of the fact that my Blog has no followers. I never realized it before, but I can just say whatever I want, without repercussions, and I don't have to worry about it going away, because I'm the one who owns it. 

    I don't think it's likely, but I wonder if there will eventually be an internet that's just made of loosely connected blogs, who comment on each other but never connect other wise. Maybe what we need is an internet with one big social media platform that everyone can go on, several mid tier platforms based on various subgroups, and stuff like my blog, sites run by idiots that nobody reads. That's the problem with the internet now, you're either on Facebook or you're running Train of Thought. 

The Coronation

     At last, after all these years of work. I've finally done it. I'm a Princess of Fairyland. Twenty two years old, and I'm on track to be one of the most powerful Fairies in Estellia. 

    I suppose, since I'm a God, I already was one, but Gods aren't involved in politics. Princesses are. I want to be political, if for no other reason than to prove that I can. 

   Naturally, they aren't giving me much to do. I have to open up a fair entrance, and oversee an execution. That's it. I wish I could start work right away, but I can't. I have to earn it, the way my father and mother earned their spots in the world. 

   I wish other fairies would stop complaining about me. I see their messages on Princess forums, stuff like, "I wanted to be a princess, but my parents needed me to work." Why they didn't just leave and make it on their own, I honestly have no clue. Humans are supposed to be the lazy ones, but I see far too many Nightmares, of all races, emulating them. 

    Well, what they think is no longer my concern. My job now is to make it as high as I can and do as much for society as possible. I aim to be the best at what I do. Nothing can stop me now. 

The End of Twitter

   Watching Twitter implode feels a little like being in 2017 again. It's horrifying, but strangely silly at the same time. You know that it's about to get awful, but everyone's being so silly that it's hard to take seriously. 

     In all honesty though, I'm a little worried. I couldn't care less what happens to Twitter, I only started posting things last year, and I stopped when I heard I might have to flee at some point. It's the people I left behind that I'm worried about. They didn't choose this, they never wanted this, some are rebelling as hard as they can. Most just seem to be lost and scared. They keep hearing that they have to fight, but they don't know how, they never signed up to be warriors of truth and justice. Worse than that, some may not want to fight, but they can't leave because they've built their entire lives on that accursed website. People are begging for an alternative to Twitter, one that might never come into being, because they don't want to have to stay and fighting is too overwhelming to them. 

    I will argue till my dying day that it should never, ever, be anybody's job to fight for justice. People should fight for the world they want, if all they ever do is fight to make the government hear them, that is the sign of tyranny. No world should ever be built on the idea the people are saints or can only survive if they are saints. That people seem to think it's okay to push people who don't want to fight into battle is appalling to me. Do we not all agree that drafting soldiers into a war they don't agree with is horrible? 

    The hard, horrible truth is that Twitter is dying. It's been dying for ages. What's going on right now is people hoping to keep it alive for just a little bit, just a while longer. But they can't. Nothing, be it living or nonliving, human or inhuman, real or imaginary, is safe from falling to the Infinite. 

The Dreamer

     "Are you really a human?"

    The voice seems to issue from nowhere. I turn to see my reflection.

    I didn't enter the temple from Estellia. I'm asleep this time. I couldn't think of a place to put the temple doorway that wasn't too conspicuous, so I'm sleeping on a bench at the library. Fortunately, the librarian knows me very well. 

    I must have been dreaming. I thought I got my dreaming over for the night, but apparently I didn't. I head down the hall, wanting to get to the study. I want to try and see if I can write a job I can keep into existence. I've never tried that before. Actually, I've never tried writing anything into existence. I just write about the world I see, and muse on the world that could be. Wow, that was a rhyme, I never thought I'd have any talent for poetry. 

   "Are you going to answer my question?"

    "Who the heck is talking? I know I didn't see anybody come… in…"

     In one of the mirrors, I can see my reflection, only too many details are off. She's wearing all black, while I always where a white shirt. Her hair is pulled up in a bun, while mine is always pulled back in a ponytail. She also looks way too calm and collected, the opposite of how I feel most of the time. 

     "Who are you?" I ask.

     "I'm you." She says, as though it weren't obvious.

     "No, you're not." I say. "I don't look like you at all." 

     "Then why do you see me whenever you look in a mirror."

     I'm about to tell her that I don't, but then I look around I see that my reflection has been replaced by her in every one of the mirrors. "What did you do?" I all but whisper.

   "I did nothing. This is all your doing. You can't expect to claim power without being changed."

   "You mean, into a Nightmare?"

    "No. Not that kind of power." She holds out her hand and produces a small ball of light. "This kind, the power of the soul. The power that lies at the heart of every Estellian, but that not one person would ever dare use. I hear they say it corrupts you, turns you into something evil." She closes her hands, and the light disappears, "I wonder, how willing are you to test that theory?"

    I'm confused. "Are you talking about Lucidity?"

    "Lucidity simply means that you can see that your world isn't real. Any fool can do that. What most won't do is admit that they are allowed to change the world into whatever form they want, so long as no one tries to stop them. Tell me, do you think people won't try to stop you from changing the world to be what you want it to be?"

   "I'm not trying to change the world. I'm trying to save it, to save us from the oppression of the Nightmares. What do you think this temple is for?"

    "If this temple is for the good of humanity," she asks, "Then why won't you let anyone see it."

    "I'd let them, if anyone else slept." I reply.

    "The Nightmares sleep, yet you don't let them near here at all. I see you spend most of your time fighting them." 

    "Nightmares and humans aren't the same." I yell.

    She looks at me, with an expression I can't read. I get the impression she feels that I'm being stupid. "What's the difference then? Would you be able to tell me, with absolute certainty, that a person was a Nightmare?"

    She's got me there. "No, but most people can." 

    "Do you not remember that Lucidity allows people to see the truth? Have you ever considered the possibility that the Humans and Nightmare are but one and the same race? That one was not meant to be food for the other, but that they were in fact meant to live in harmony?"

   "Were they?" I ask.

   "I don't know. History is quite fuzzy, as I'm sure you've no doubt noticed. One thing I must know before I depart. Knowing everything I told you, would you become a Nightmare if the chance was offered to you?"

    Puzzled, I say, "Well, no Nightmare would ever offer me up the opportunity, so I don't see how it's relevant. If I were the kind of human destined to become a Nightmare, I wouldn't be homeless in the Human City."

   "I see." she says, "Farewell, Dreamer."

 

  I awake with a start. The first thing that crosses my mind is how dark it is. I'm not normally awake this late at night, usually I fall asleep at dusk and wake up at dawn. I don't like being awake in the dark. It's like being in the Infinite, only everything can attack you at a moment's notice. 

   Then it hits me. Whoever that was called me Dreamer. As in, The Dreamer. The person who dreams all of Estellia into existence. 

    That can't be right, though. I'm not only a human, but nobody on either side of my family has ever even served a Nightmare, let alone become one themselves. Nobody would choose me as the Dreamer. Not even my parents, the only people who have ever loved me. 

   My brain turns over what she said, and I can't seem to just dismiss it. Plenty of people know how to ignore things they know are false, but I've never been able to do that. Maybe it's because most of the books that I read are fiction books. I know none of them are real, but I can imagine them so vividly that they feel real to me. 

    I try to imagine, now, what it must be like to be The Dreamer. You'd need a room, with a really nice bed to sleep on. You'd need someone to bring you food and water, because of course The Dreamer would have weaknesses stronger than even the strongest of High Nightmares. You'd need something nice to dream about, like home. 

  Not unlike my nighttime Dreams. 

  Was all of this an omen for me being The Dreamer? Am I letting myself be homeless and unhappy for no reason?

  That makes no sense. Humans only control things when they're asleep, right?

  Then again, I did see the Infinite while I was awake. I have been moving the temple from place to place, and sleeping in a bed in my house. 

  Maybe she's right. Maybe I'm not human after all. 

The Elon Musk Litmus Test

    In light of The Hostile Twitter Takeover (Elon Musk Edition), I think we've all learned a lot about each other. We've seen who will cuddle up to Elon Musk, who is willing to condemn him; who knows this will be a disaster, who thinks this is no big deal; who wants to leave, who is criticizing others for even saying they want to leave; who is focused on this and who is hoping this will all go away. I won't claim this is true, but I'm sure all of us now have at least one person we respect just a little less for not reacting the way we would in this situation.

    I don't have much of a presence on Twitter, nobody cares whether I leave or stay. But to all my follower, hear are my thoughts. I think Elon Musk is one of the worst people alive. His core philosophy, as far as I can tell, seems to be based on the "I'm rich, so I can do what I want" school of thought. He's basically a younger and slightly less ugly Donald Trump, and we should all be very grateful that he can't run for election. I think him gaining ownership of Twitter will be disastrous for everyone on the platform, especially those who need social media for there survival. Granted, from what I've heard that's less of a problem on Twitter than it would be on Facebook. This may, in fact, be a glimpse into the future of every current social media platform. I think that everyone who wants to leave should, whether they want to do so publicly or privately. I'm staying until I don't think it's safe anymore, which by my calculations should put my departure somewhere around the new year. I'm not tweeting, or talking, much about this, but I am paying the closest attention I can. 

      This isn't just about Twitter. What Musk does do, what he doesn't do, what he does but has to walk back, all of it will set the stage for what the downfall of social media will look like. It may not look like it to most, but at the edges I hear many muted rumblings of discontent. It's not that they can't talk, it's that the current environment isn't willing to let them be heard. 

    Whatever you have to say about the left, their presence lets other people know that they're welcomed and they won't be hurt. We're not warriors, we flee as soon as trouble comes because we know better than anyone else what trouble brings. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, if you give people enough to live comfortably, they'll let you get away with anything. The people in charge now aren't interested in giving us anything. They're willing to let people like Musk, and Trump rule the world with no consequences. So long as they aren't afraid for their lives, they don't give a damn. 

    I don't think the goal should be to win this fight. If you want to fight, or you don't want to go down wishing you'd done more, than fight all you can. But don't ruin yourself. This isn't the fight we have to win. That would be a much bigger fight, one that encompasses all of humanity, even the ones who don't live in what western people think of as civilization. If our goal is for our species to live forever, we need to move past the idea that Society comes before everything else. This includes Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram, but it also includes our current government system. If it's not meeting our needs, then something has to change. We can't keep building worlds assuming that our descendants will be better people than we are. 

        I think we need to stop trying to save the world. We need to focus on what we need to build to replace it.